By Sean Newton ‘15
Two weeks ago we launched our Booth’s Missed Connections website ostensibly as one more tool to help connect Booth students. Early results of actually connecting people are unpromising, but that didn’t stop us from uncovering some gems of the written language. Below are some of our favorite (100% real) posts. Hope y’all find each other!
Heavily-Glassesed Career Services Panelist
Saw you in C25 last Wednesday sitting on the panel for some career services panel. Didn’t write your name down or nothing like that. Think you got like super industrial-sized purple or red glasses. They look heavy, but man you sure managed to keep your chin up.
Anyway at this panel I was at I overheard you mention that you had an internship last summer. That’s so coincidental, because I’m looking for an internship for this summer! Needless to say, our interests are extremely similar, so it would be wonderful to set up some time to chat.
Calling all Mackenzies
We haven’t had any official conversations or anything, but I did see you with your nametag on a couple of times walking around campus. We briefly got introduced at the Halloween party. You probably remember me… my Breaking Bad costume got confused for a sexy hazmat suit and I won an award for most tasteful and timely costume. Ring any bells? You handed me the award and said your name was Mackenzie. So I was thinking… maybe you can get me a job at McKinsey?
Dear Phone Freak
I stood next to you at the urinal twice this week. Both times you took your phone out of your pants and began typing on it. Your backlight is extremely bright. If you insist on forcing the rest of the urinating world to stare at your text messages, would you mind dialing down the brightness? More importantly, since when do you feel comfortable having conversations of any kind with anyone when you’re in that position? If you are incapable of resisting the urge to take your phone out when you take it out, you seriously have a problem. Also, your mom needs to learn how to spell.
Contact me if you’d like to apologize.
Girl with No Ring
Saw you on the Metra. You had no rings. I overheard mention of a boyfriend but sounds like things might be going south? I ran after you. Too slow. Contact me after Black Friday - lol.
Are You My TA?
Nobody knows who my Investments TA is and his name isn’t on Chalk. Is it you? If so, contact me immediately and we can play 20 Questions. I ask the questions and you answer them. Sound familiar? Yeah, that’s because it’s your damn job description. So stop hiding from me. Reveal yourself!
Changing Room Mishap
I’m the somewhat muscular man you walked in on in the changing room. I’m sorry for forgetting to lock the door, but maybe if this works out, I won’t be sorry for long. I thought your stunned face was so genuine and so pretty. The shock in your eyes was so genuine and so pretty. The way you slammed the door shut was so genuine and … maybe a little rude, but also so pretty. The experience wasn’t traumatizing for me at all. It just got me thinking about how I could really use a genuine, pretty girl in my life right now. What do you think? Think you might want to see even MORE of me?